Madrid, Spain – Chief Sephardi Rabbi Shlomo Amar ruled Sunday that a 13-year-old boy who passed away over the weekend in Madrid had to be buried in a separate burial section demarcated by a row of trees because he had converted to Judaism in a Conservative rabbinical court.
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Ben-David was buried Sunday in a special section of Madrid’s Jewish cemetery reserved for people whose Jewishness is in question.
Rabbi Moshe Ben-Dahan, the Chief Orthodox Rabbi of Madrid, told The Jerusalem Post that Amar ruled against burying Ben-David in the main part of Madrid’s Jewish cemetery.
“We are an Orthodox community and we never had a situation like this before,” said Ben-Dahan, speaking by phone from Madrid.
“The Rishon Lezion [Amar] told us that this was the Halacha, to bury him in a separate area. He gave us clear directions on this issue.”
According to Halacha, non-Jews or people whose Jewishness has not been confirmed cannot be buried together with Jews.
Conservative practice also forbids the burial of non-Jews with Jews, but Orthodox rabbis do not recognize the validity of a Conservative conversion.
Rabbi David Golinkin, president and rector of the Conservative Schechter Institute in Jerusalem, ruled that one of the reasons for separating Jews and non-Jews in a cemetery is to combat intermarriage.
Amar was in Madrid for a Hanukka candlelighting ceremony and could not be reached for comment.
Ben-Dahan said that originally the funeral procession was supposed to go through a side gate not used in Jewish funerals. This was because a line of trees cut off the plots where Ben-David was being buried from the rest of the cemetery.
“But in the end we downed a few trees to make it possible to go through the main gate,” he said.
Gai Ben-David, who celebrated his bar mitzva in June, died from a brain tumor.
About a year ago he, his mother, Jessica, and his sister converted to Judaism at the Ahavat Shalom Congregation in Fort Worth, Texas.
Gai’s father, Zohar Ben-David, an Israeli emigre, told the Post via telephone that he had to fight for the right to have the funeral process go through the front gate of the cemetery.
“I was completely opposed to any suggestion that my son is not a Jew,” said Ben-David. “Gai was more Jewish than anyone.
“But eventually I decided not to go on with the objections. It was causing a lot of pain to the people who love Gai. In the end the ruling of the Rishon Lezion was honored. Gai was buried beyond the cemetery in a separate area.”
Ben-David said that members of the Masorti (Conservative) community in Madrid were putting together a petition declaring that all members would be buried in the same area where Gai was buried.
“People told me that when their time comes, they want to buried together with Gai.”
Ben-David, who works as a project manager for a telecommunications company in Madrid, said that he had no intention of attacking anyone in the community.
“Many good people from the Orthodox community have helped me and shown me support. I am just sad about the situation.
“Gai learned in the Jewish school in Madrid. He was an angel and he had so much love. He was a very, very special person, and I hope that he will unite something in the Jewish community.”
this sounds like a baal shem tov story
This sounds like upstate NY. I remember, my Father Zt”l telling me, remember, a Jew is a Jew wherever you go. You’ll still be a Jew. This child is still a Jew, and the community should be ashamed of themselves.
I see racism and bigotry goes even into death with Jews, worse then antisemitic people
“Gai was more Jewish than anyone. “
NO he wasnt! If someone “converts” conservative they might as well have stayed a goy. You cannot argue Halocha and if you do, you are a kofer too.
I am glad that somebody has the guts to take a stand
apparently you missed the story. the cemetery is an (orthodox) Jewish one. accordingly converting thru a conservative “rabbi” is just that, a conservative conversion and not a (orthodox) Jewish one. according to halacha he can’t be buried in a orthodox cemetery but is more then welcome in conservative one which is what they did. not sure how that’s worse then anti semetisim.
Uhm, its my understanding, Am HaAretz that I am, that the case of children is different. The problem with non-Orthodox conversions is, of course (can I say that?) the extent of the Kabbalat HaMitzvot. But this requires Daat. — capability — that a child does not yet have. So… this is an old discussion that has to do with Zachim L’Adam She LoBiphnav (we (Bet Din) will operate for one’s benefit even if he isnt around). Can that be used to convert a minor? What if the family isnt so observant, etc.
I forget where it was, but Ger katan is a sugya, thank you, and the mere fact that Kabbalat HaMitzvot may have been lacking here does not necessarily invalidate a conversion , *since it was a child*. I guess you could talk about whether the Beit Din was “kosher” or not, but you know, that is very slippery terroritory.
Some conservative rabbis are more traditional then others…
Now, the Rishon LeTzion does not need to be reminded of this from moi. But to all those who think this is a simple thing… Its not. Not with kids.
What impressed me here was that the father seems to harbor no real animosity.
Sounds like a mentchlik guy. We can all learn from that.
This is the unbelievable tragedy of the conservative and reform non profit social organizations. They should have the decency of NOT performing conversions. Personally I am mispallel that those converts are just lost Yidden who somehow find their way back through these social clubs and are Jewish by birth.
perhaps the problem with the giur is not if the guer lives and acts as jew..
the problem is who can be rabbi. and how can be member of a beit din…
this is a terible tragedy for the father but this is an old story-if you don’t do the conversion the right way in the first place ,you’ll have lots of tsuris one way or another down the line.in america it’s possible to say a person didn’t know the difference but i can’t see how that would be possiible in ey.
Although I didn’t know this family, I do know this rabbi of this Conservative congregaton. Unfortuanetly this is stuff he loves to hear. He looks for every opportunity to villify Orthodoxy every chance he gets.
What I have often found interesting is Reform converts are not buried in “his” cemetary here because he does not recognize Reform conversions. Go Figure.
I met Rabbi Ben-Dahan a year and a half ago on a trip to Madrid. I could tell that he is a total mentsch (can I use a Yiddish word to compliment a Sefardic rabbi?) even though I spoke little Spanish and he does not speak English. I am certain that he handled this situation with as much care and grace as was possible under the circumstances. While sometimes rabbis have to give bad halachic news to people it should always be done with compassion.
sad story. why didnt any one notice the boy had a fake conversion a year ago, a year before his fake bar mitzvah. if the father cared enough , why did his gentile wife and child wait all these years to convert ? didnt it bother this jewish israeli that his wife and son were goyim until a only year ago ? another sad story of intermarriage. not much of a jewish newsworthy article, since the boy wasnt even jewish.
I’d say it lekulah too. A conservative “rabbi” is an apikores, and is posul ledayonus.
R Aharon z”l isn’t around to ask him for his reasoning in the case you cited. And without an explanation we can’t know what criteria he was using. It is POSSIBLE, and this is only a GUESS, that these rabbis were orthodox people who took jobs at C temples for parnossoh, just like Yonoson ben Gershom ben Me(na)she; that used to be common a long time ago, but has become almost unheard-of in the last few decades. I would think that even such a person is posul ledayonus, because he is voluntarily “mischaber lorosho”, but perhaps there is room to argue that even though he’s doing the wrong thing it doesn’t passel him, at least enough to create a sofek.