Brooklyn, NY – Project YES will be hosting a live, free teleconference entitled “Purim Parenting: Keeping Our Children Safe and Sober” on February 11th at 10:00 PM in an effort to combat the rising problem of alcoholism in the community. Rabbi Yakov Horowitz and Rabbi Benzion Twerski will discuss the impact and severity of this problem in addition to offering concrete advice to parents who are worried about their children’s drinking.
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Rabbi Horowitz, Founder and Director of Project YES, will be joined by Dr. Benzion Twerski, a renowned psychologist who specializes in the area of substance abuse with years of experience in treating frum addicts to discuss this growing problem. “It is the responsibility of today’s parents to be knowledgeable about the dangers of alcohol consumption and the symptoms of substance abuse” says Rabbi Horowitz. Both hosts strongly feel that being informed, up to date, and hands-on in dealing with these issues are the greatest predetermining factors in guiding our children through the stormy teen-age years. Click here for Rabbi Horowitz’s exclusive VIN article on substance abuse.
The teleconference will take place from 10:00 p.m. – 11:00 p.m. on Thursday, February 11th. The dial in number is (712) 432-1001 and when prompted enter the access code 455963558#. The public is invited to submit questions in advance of the conference (or while listening to the conference) by email to: [email protected]
Project YES was founded by Agudath Israel in 1998 to provide support to troubled teens and their families. Project YES provides provides teen mentoring, parent mentoring, student advocacy, referrals, phone counseling services, parenting lectures, teachers and school administrators workshops, an interactive website, and the dissemination of parenting tapes and books.
Editors note: If you have any specific issues you would like addressed during the conference call please post them in the comments section
Every purim we read about the tragedies related to drinking and driving after purim celbrations held at shuls, mesivtas and other mosdos. The rabbonim could literally save many lives by simply issuing an issur on drinking on purim. The “as shelo yadah” mindset is a real chillul hashem and is NOT a mitzvah. It is a minhag that that predates driving and could be terminated if several of the gadolim simply said “no more drinking on purim–NO EXCEPTIONs!!” . They would make themselves a lot more relevant than their recent efforts to ban the internet and other much less important issues.
This should be mandatory for any one teaching children. Every year I have to combat shtuss they tell my children about how beautiful they find it to see bochurim (underage!) stumbling drunk in the street.
Shame on them for using the mitzva of drinking on purim as a forum to further an agenda or even to bring awarness about drinking and alchohol.
do it a diffrent time.
it’s am itzveh bfairish in toireh to say lchaim on purim “ad deloi yodah..” mamesh, ad d’loi yoda! for those who have issues though, yes it needs to be cautioned.
how about having parents not drink as well as the kids
some people feel that purim is the only time they are accepted for what they are, drinking is not the issue it is just a manifestation of a much larger issue that goes on being ignored….
Every Rav should stop advocating this silly drunkeness. Parents smash those heavy bottles of heavy liquor. It’s about time. To those who still advocate this problem-shame on u. You are truly a tipesh.
I would like to commend this teleconference. It is of utmost importance and we should be jamming those phone lines. Additionally if they could also address the issue of orange juice consumption at brissim in our community. It is almost unfathomable to understand why it is that if someone comes even five minutes late to a bris, all the orange containers are already weightless, simply put: EMPTY. Is that fair not to leave anything for anybody else? Besides for all the acid that kills the teeth and weight gain that comes from it. I would appreciate if Rabbis Twersky and Horowitz can address this issue as well.
In Vienna our neighbors were Kopyczinitzer Chasidim and my father A’H davened in the Belzer Klaus . Being shiker under any circumstance was considered a goyishe mida and an erlicher Yid never was shiker. Being shiker on Purim is an American frumkeit
lol its a mitzvah so drink away people
Kudos to Rabbi Horowitz, Dr. Benzion Twerski, and all those fighting the good fight against dangerous drinking on Purim–and throughout the years.
The brain does not react differently when it is Purim, or Friday night, or whatever. The brain becomes intoxicated from a certain concentration of alcohol. The frontal lobes, iethe rational decision-making areas of the brain,are generally 1st to get incapacitated leading you to do foolish, even dangerous things–judgement decreases and quickly is gone. With higher concentrations of alcohol, other areas of the brain start to malfunction, resulting in possible hallucinations, coma, seizures, and even death.
Addiction to alcohol can occur quite easily, starting with psychological addiction and soon leading to physical addiction.
Alcoholism is one of the leading causes of illness and death in the Western world.
Let’s no longer fool ourselves and pretend that alcoholism is not a Jewish trait.
We have imported much from the outside world. Alcoholism is one of these imports.
Is project YES looking for a reason to exist? Where’s the “rising problem?” Why would a “rising problem” address one day of drinking–Purim, when the minhag is to drink.
rabbosei keep on drinking ad dlo yoda how sad that these 2 rabbanim use the mitzva of drinking on purim to further their agenda or raise awareness about alcohol.
חייב איניש לבסומי בפוריה עד דלא ידע! Bottoms up! Ignore the kill joys who blame problems on the shulcan oruch
I have to agree with the Orange juice issue. I think its a much bigger problem than the alcohol consumption, as brissin take place every day. I may have a solution though. Either the baal simcha must put out three containers per table. Or there should be someone in cahrge of making sure that no one drinks more than one cup, like a bouncer of some sort. Any other ideas are welcome.
Hey, all you naysayers out there in cyberland. These guys are not advocating being mevatel anything, not Torah, not mederabonons. They are not against ad delo yoda. They are against danger, and that is good for the Jews. If you were mekayem ad delo yoda without shikruso shel Lot, you’d be okay. Only, stopping at that point is a challenge, and there are dangers beyond that, not the least of which is chilul Hashem. You’d be better off listening to the teleconference than sitting there bashing them on your keyboard.
This is so misleading. Can they rename it Project NO for this “No Drinking on Purim” campaign??
Chazal new better
CHEIOV ODOM LEBESUMI BIPREIO
AD DLO YODA
just don’t drive
BE carefull to drink only AD vlo ad bchlal
From the orange juice commentators it seems like some people are drunk already. They are diluting the issue, but hey what the heck, “Marbim B’simcha” Bring it on early. We can all use Simcha. Especially now that he’s in the comptroller’s office. We need to compensate somehow. What could be more b’simchadig than some good bris orange juice humor. C’mon guys, bring it on.
Some on VIN argue the danger of drinking on Purim while others argue the Mitzvah of Ad Deloy Yada.
In Lubavitch, The Rebbe has “fixed” this problem decades ago by making a very strict rule that anyone under the age of 40 was never (including Purim) permitted to drink more than the amount of 3 or 4 SMALL 1oz cups of Lechaim.
At Purim Farbrengen’s, the Rebbe would ask for One (just one single elderly) Chassid to be Motzi the entire Olam with Ad Deloy Yada.
The system worked great and was enforced. There were very few isolated incidents of violators which were very quickly corrected.
It seems that there is a major difference in responsible drinking after the age of 40, where people after that age are much more responsible in their drinking and associated behavior.
#3 – Every Rav should stop advocating…
#16 – The rabbonim could… by simply issuing an issur…
#17 – … should be mandatory for any one teaching children.
#20 – … have the Rabbanim say that “it is an outright Aveireh…
I am sure I am not the only one who observed how often those who are against Torah, mitzvos, minhagei Yisroel and frum life, in their characteristically exceeding humility, have a ready advise to “every Rav” on what they should say and do.
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#12 – “The brain becomes intoxicated from a certain concentration of alcohol.”
Yeah, on Purim that’s sort of the point… 🙂
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#11 – “Is project YES looking for a reason to exist?”
You nailed it, my friend!
I truly hope that all those making light of this issue are victims of a drunk driver. B’meheira V’yameinu.
Seriously, there is a world of difference between some drinking and binge drinking. There is definitely a need for limits and for designated drivers. You are well outside the mitzvah zone once you are in the emergency room.
If they would also put out vodka by the brisim so u can mix it together with the orange juice (cocktail mix) the problem with the orange juice would be solved!
fyi: for al of u who think u are such gedolim, please look at the poskim. MOST hold that on SHOULD NOT get drunk on purim. I.e. mishna brura, yesod veshoresh hoavoda, binyan olam, chochmas manoach, pri megadim, gra,and many others. in fact the bais yosef brings down the rosh which says that one shouldn’t get drunk – shehashichros issur gamur hoo, vi-ain licha avaira gedola mizu. there are MANY different explanation of the gemara ad dilo yada – look it up. as an educator of junior high and highschool (ny area) I feel it IS of importance to share the dangers, and these sheetos with them so that we will have a safe purim and fewer buchrim addicted to alchohol ( and smoking – when did that become a mitzva?)
haven’t you all noticed how more teens are smoking than 10 yrs ago? more kids are drinking than 10 yrs ago? this is after all the hysteria how tobacco companies are worse than terrorists, taxes non-stop on cigarettes, etc. The bigger the issue you make of it the more the kids will abuse it. This teleconference is stupid and self-defeating. The same is with the ads in the papers. It’s all about some org wanting publicity so they can raise more $$$$. The kids see right thru it and its a shame. It would be better to talk about designated drivers, drinking in moderation, adult supervision than assuring hard liquor.
this purim i will be mekayim the mitzva of ad deloy yuda with all the chimros i will drink so much till i throw up all over your house
I think this is great!rather be prepared than suffer the concenquences.we should all have hatzlocho w our children
I am fond of the cup so to speak. I love to get really wasted once in a while. Therefore, I am certainly not looking for any “kulles” in this inyan. I finally have a mitzva that the Yetzer Horah helps me be mekayim with all the hiddurim so I won’t pass up this opportunity.
Reply to #24 :
I am a neurologist. I’ve seen many tragedies from excess drinking.
A couple of years ago, I was privileged to lecture at the national convention of Agudath Israel of America about how alcohol and drugs (including nicotine) affect the brain, and how addictive they truly are for many individuals.
Alcoholism is no joke, despite what some have written here.
Why people insist on getting dangerously drunk and why some rebbes encourage this is beyond me. Last year, I saw a bochur lie down in the middle of the street; another tried to punch me.. Hatzolah members probably have worse stories.
I also have seen slobbering drunk people who of course are unable to daven or learn for 24 hours or more.
The danger of an atmosphere will permits, nay encourages wanton drinking by our youth goes beyond the immediate risks. Many youths become addicted to alcohol.
These are the youths who go from simcha to simcha. [How any adult can allow a youth to drink on his premises and risk criminal and civil liabilities is also beyond me.]
There is a halachically acceptable remedy on Purim: take a bit more alcohol than usual, and take a nap.
But that would simply not be fun.
Got the solution for the overwhelming orange juice problem at brissim. $1.00 per cup and it goes to tzeduka. Project yes will monitor the collectors in charge. HAPPY PURIM
for those of you who feel that drinking on Purim is such a critical mitzva, why don’t you speak to any Hatzalah member in any “frum” neighborhood…. about the hatzala calls on purim that are critical life & death from kids that are fulfilling ad delo yodah.ask them about how they have to take 2 or 3 kids in an ambulance at one time because they are short on ambulances. they should be thrilled to help people be mekayaim ad delo yodah and don’t mind the disturbance to their yom tov.
why don’t you have a little chat with parents whose children were in critical motor vehicle and other kinds of accidents due to purim drinking. they can proudly spend the rest of their lives, knowing they fulfilled ad delo yodah.
or you can speak to parents whose children spent months in the hospital recovering from alchohol poisoning. they have the rest of their lives to thank the people who gave their kids drinks to fulfill ad delo yodah.
rabosai… wake up and be real
feel another person’s pain
this is a real problem and let’s work together
it is pikuach nefesh and hatzalas nefoshos, not a joke!!
join the teleconference and see what it’s all about AND WHAT YOU CAN DO TO HELP
Chazal new better
CHEIOV ODOM LEBESUMI BIPREIO
AD DLO YODA
just don’t drive
BE carefull to drink only AD vlo ad bchlal
It is sad day when adults (bar mitzvah and up) are not adults – or the over 25 + crowd does not influence the younger aged adults how to drink on Purim. Gedolei Yisroel gave out schnapps on Purim night as Simchas Purim!! And I still do! Do you kmow why? Because my kids from toddler up are taught by responsible adults how to handle wine and bromfin! And are taught of the dangers of it! I have a better idea Let’s have 0 tolerance of teenage driving untill 22. How dare we insist on 0 tolerance on even a minhag if we don’t grapple with inyomei reshus such as driving! Try walking! Or if tour from Lakewood Monsey what did you do before age 18? You got rides or your parents took you! So these same parents who taught to drive safely when you are 18 should teach you to drink responsibly on purim!
In truth, why limit the fuss strictly to the consumption of alcoholic beverages, in fact, if someone were to consume 8 lbs of matzo in one sitting, most probably they would die. I would therefore suggest that after Project Yes is done with Purim, they should take on the Matzo over-eating plague that potentially can have fatal consequences. Although this phenomenon might not have occurred yet, let’s be proactive in preventing it from happening all together. Thank you.
The stupidity of the posters tonight is overwhelming when it comes to saying its OK to get drunk on Purim because there is a minhag to do so. Go back in the archives for the past several years and look at the stories about tragic accidents driving home from purim celebrations. No gadol has ever advocated excessive drinking on Purim and any rav that might do so would not be considered to be an idiot and would properly be ignored.
#51 wake up and be real. The problem lies with adults letting their children run amok on Purim and not with some kind of imagined alcoholics in the neighborhood.
There are ONLY 4 special mitzvos on Purim – Megilla, Mishloach Manos, Matanos Leevyonim & Seuda. There is NO mitzva to drink, and definitely not to get drunk.
There is a mitzva of kiddush on shabbos & Yom Tov, but the mitzva is not “DRINK WINE” but like most mitzvos, it is to take the gashmius and make it kodosh – making kiddush on it.
If you can use wine to be mesameach & as part of the seuda of Purim, taking the mundane & making it holy, THEN you are being mekayim a mitzva. Most people nowadays have no concept of this, which is why we have a situation where it is Hatzoloh’s busiest day of the year, with one avoidable tragedy after the next.
The people here who are objecting to this conference and “claiming” – ‘Mitzva, Mitzva’, you are only fooling yourself – the only agenda you have is to drink and get drunk.
Project YES does have an agenda – to help people. Drinking on Purim is a severe problem, not only for teenagers but for many adults too. This is a situation which can be rectified which Rabbi Horowitz and Dr. Benzion Twerski hope to address. (If you read Rabbi Horowitz article on substance abuse (link above) you will see how bad it is.)
Please don’t take this lightly.
Wow, I can’t believe the number of people blasting the mitzva of drinking on Purim due to consequences that involved other factors. If a kid died driving drunk, the problem was the driving. If a kid was too sick to say kriyas shema bizman, then problem was a) lack of yir’as shomayim, b) lack of instruction on how to vomit before going to sleep to reduce the hangover. There’s always a side factor that can be eliminated before eliminating the mitzva/minhag.
Regarding the detractors who scream “alchoholism” – Dudes, no one becomes an alchoholic from getting drunk once a year. Especially not after purim kotton, with all the vomiting and sickness.
Alchoholism from general drinking is only a risk in certain environs. I know many people who have been drinking heavily several times a week since their teens and they are not alchoholics.* It does not afflict everyone equally, and only those at risk should be kept away from the schnops served a kiddushes or after shacharis.
And finally, #45 in response to #42 : Holy moly! Did you just equate a heterosexual bochur to a bochur with a drug addiction? Are you freaking nuts? Count your blessings!
If they would only serve wine & not hard liquor we would not have such a problem
YES!!! but will this stop the rebbeim from giving their underage talmidim a l’chaim when he comes to deliver shalachmonos to his rebbe?
It is sad day when adults (bar mitzvah and up) are not adults – or the over 25 + crowd does not influence the younger aged adults how to drink on Purim. Gedolei Yisroel gave out schnapps on Purim night as Simchas Purim!! And I still do! Do you kmow why? Because my kids from toddler up are taught by responsible adults how to handle wine and bromfin! And are taught of the dangers of it! I have a better idea Let’s have 0 tolerance of teenage driving untill 22. How dare we insist on 0 tolerance on even a minhag if we don’t grapple with inyomei reshus such as driving! Try walking! Or if tour from Lakewood Monsey what did you do before age 18? You got rides or your parents took you! So these same parents who taught to drive safely when you are 18 should teach you to drink responsibly on purim!
There are many dimensions to this problem. A few years ago I was at a friend’s house when her teenage son came in – drunk as you can get and still stand up. He was obnoxious to the point where I asked him where on earth he had gotten so drunk. You know what he told me? His rebbe! His rebbe was handing out schnapps without limit to the talmidim who came to visit him. I wasn’t ready to believe this, but I checked with other people and it seemed to be true.
The rebbe in question was young, and I hope he learns quickly – and without any painful incidents – about alcohol abuse, and about state laws. B”H none of his students was in a car accident, and he didn’t get arrested for giving alcohol to minors, but that wasn’t his fault. Let’s check up on our kids’ role models, and also our own behavior.
some of you bloggers sound drunk already
I once read about the evils of partying, that’s when I stopped reading. So be happy, drink and be merry. It only takes one drink to get me loaded, I just can’t remember if it’s the fifteenth or the sixteenth. Like I told the officer who pulled me over, “There isn’t a drop of blood in my alcohol system and I swear to drunk I’m not god.” In this inebriated and irrigated state I wish you all a hearty L’chaim and a brocha that the floor should stop moving. Bottoms up!
torah and the twleve steps. its not about the mitzva of drinking on purim or not its about luck of spirtuality in our lives, and thats what the kids sees. let us all come closer to Ribono Shel Olam and daven for our survival..