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Great Neck, NY - Fear Of Indecency Prompts Rabbi To Crash Party

Published on:   March 9, 2010 10:36 PM
News Source:  The Jewish Week
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Rabbi Mordechai AderetRabbi Mordechai Aderet

Great Neck, NY - Like biblical plagues raining down on them from an angry God, the white-bearded, black-hatted rabbi laid a string of curses upon the unsuspecting suburban partygoers. Banging a siddur on a table and screaming “Shema Yisrael,” the rabbi, accompanied by a four-man entourage — all of whom had burst into a Great Neck home — lit into those gathered for an evening of celebration, mixed dancing and traditional Iranian fare in honor of a little girl’s first birthday.

After “shrieking Hebrew oaths,” the “uninvited” rabbi launched into a “lengthy diatribe” during which he told those who chose to remain at the party that they would be cursed with “illness, bankruptcy and tragedy for eternity,” according to a petition signed by some of those in attendance.

“They just came right in like a storm, inside the middle of the party,” said a woman who attended the December party but, like many others contacted by The Jewish Week, asked to remain anonymous because she fears for her safety. “They started to curse everybody, saying — ‘You’re going to have tragedies, everyone who stays here.’”

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Guests and their children were allegedly so frightened by the rabbi’s intrusion that many left, while others stood shaking and crying, according to those in attendance. 

Read the full story at The Jewish Week 


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Read Comments (61)  —  Post Yours »

1

 Mar 09, 2010 at 09:46 PM Gregaaron Says:

This is not representative of our Rabbonim in general, so please let's not have all of the usual anti-Torah commenters ranting about "Taliban concert-banning Rabbis".

2

 Mar 09, 2010 at 09:46 PM yosse nathan Says:

as my late parents of blessed memoray used to say . there are three sides to every storey , A , B , and the truth

3

 Mar 09, 2010 at 09:47 PM Just Thinking Says:

I am sure a family member asked him to come. I know Rabbi Aderet, I can easily see him giving such a tirade but not to just randomly crash a home. He has done tons of work with the community though.

4

 Mar 09, 2010 at 09:48 PM Anonymous Says:

There's got to be more to this story...

5

 Mar 09, 2010 at 09:52 PM Baloney Says:

There must be more to the story. Rabbi Aderet is a well known and respected Rov who is a Rabbi a shul great Neck every other Shabbos (he takes turns with someone else.)

7

 Mar 09, 2010 at 10:02 PM Anonymous Says:

B"h we still have people doing the right thing

8

 Mar 09, 2010 at 10:08 PM Funny Says:

Only by Sephardim Can you have this scene of "Guests and their children were allegedly so frightened by the rabbi’s intrusion that many left, while others stood shaking and crying,"

9

 Mar 09, 2010 at 10:10 PM Anonymous Says:

very good chazak chazak

10

 Mar 09, 2010 at 10:19 PM Anonymous Says:

Reply to #1  
Gregaaron Says:

This is not representative of our Rabbonim in general, so please let's not have all of the usual anti-Torah commenters ranting about "Taliban concert-banning Rabbis".

You are correct. Most Rabbonim have better things to do with their time.

11

 Mar 09, 2010 at 10:45 PM Positivity and Simcha is what is needed Says:

What's so good about this? is this way to reach yidden? Only through love, not through intimidation and fear...is this our yiddishkeit?! This is definitely not the way chabad lubavitch would ever act!

12

 Mar 09, 2010 at 10:44 PM Anonymous Says:

he has helped shape the greatneck community and many people now cover their hair go to the mivah and keep shabbos because of him,
halivey we have these rabbis in our ashkanaz world that we would shake

13

 Mar 09, 2010 at 10:39 PM Male Nurse Says:

Chazak Vamatz. May those who left recieve a divine blessing. PPL are still doing the right thing. no room for political correctness in Judaisim,

15

 Mar 09, 2010 at 10:53 PM Anonymous Says:

Nice to see a Rabbi who says the right thing and NOT what is not politically correct. This is what rabbonim would do in the "alter heim"

16

 Mar 09, 2010 at 11:05 PM Anonymous Says:

Let his try that with the SY's in Brooklyn and see how far he gets.

17

 Mar 09, 2010 at 11:15 PM A.R. Says:

He is a chasuv Rav and I have spoken to him personally before. There is more to the story and it would be unfair to read a Jewish WEAK article and assume that this is the whole story.

19

 Mar 09, 2010 at 11:25 PM Halacha Says:

There is a mitzvah of "hochai'ach tochiach es amisech vilo seesa oluv chait" this is brought lihalacha in shulcchan aruch, orech chaim s. 608:2. Not like some MO think that dina dimalchusa allows mixed dancing so who is this rabbi to mix in? Halacha is always the bottom line and MO ignorance of shulchan aruch is not an excuse. Kudos to Rav Aderet. Chazak vi'amatz

20

 Mar 09, 2010 at 11:51 PM Anonymous Says:

A nowdays Rabbi Yockov Yosef Herman (All for The Boss) thats what America needs. He broke up a mixed dancing, about time so Rabbonim practice what they preach!!!

21

 Mar 09, 2010 at 11:51 PM Anonymous Says:

Reply to #11  
Positivity and Simcha is what is needed Says:

What's so good about this? is this way to reach yidden? Only through love, not through intimidation and fear...is this our yiddishkeit?! This is definitely not the way chabad lubavitch would ever act!

# 11 sometimes love is tough. What a kiddush Hashem this Rabbi did.

22

 Mar 09, 2010 at 11:54 PM Anonymous Says:

Typical Anti-Frum unJewish Week article. I am sure there is more, as in THE TRUTH - which this farshultina rag wont cover.

After reading the "story" in the unJewish Week, I think the Rabbi should be honored at the next dinner of every major organization. Someone has to tell these people the way it is instead of sugarcoating it all the time.

23

 Mar 09, 2010 at 11:59 PM Anonymous Says:

MO do not allow mixed dancing.
And while it is true that they have somewhat distorted the meaning of dina demalchusah they have never used it as an excuse to be oiver halocho.

24

 Mar 10, 2010 at 12:00 AM Anonymous Says:

Don't be silly. He did not "shriek hebrew oaths".

25

 Mar 10, 2010 at 12:02 AM Anonymous Says:

Who has a party for a one-year-old that goes until 10pm?

26

 Mar 10, 2010 at 12:07 AM Anonymous Says:

I'm sure Rav Moshe a"h would have handled the same situation the exact same way. Reb Yaakov a"h too. And Rav Pam a"h. And Rav SZ Aurbach a"h.

27

 Mar 10, 2010 at 01:31 AM Anonymous Says:

Reply to #23  
Anonymous Says:

MO do not allow mixed dancing.
And while it is true that they have somewhat distorted the meaning of dina demalchusah they have never used it as an excuse to be oiver halocho.

what exactly is the annual "hampton shul dinner dance"???
its still an officially recognized orthodox shul -- albeit modern orthodox.

28

 Mar 10, 2010 at 03:20 AM Milhouse Says:

Reply to #3  
Just Thinking Says:

I am sure a family member asked him to come. I know Rabbi Aderet, I can easily see him giving such a tirade but not to just randomly crash a home. He has done tons of work with the community though.

The story doesn't say it was random. It says he heard at a bris that morning about this den of iniquity, so he came to break it up and give them mussar. Good for him.

29

 Mar 10, 2010 at 03:21 AM Milhouse Says:

Didn't you read it? There was mixed dancing. That's what gives.

30

 Mar 10, 2010 at 03:22 AM Milhouse Says:

Reply to #10  
Anonymous Says:

You are correct. Most Rabbonim have better things to do with their time.

What could be a more important use of a rov's time than to DO HIS JOB, which is to keep Jews from sinning? What is a rov hired for, if not for this?

31

 Mar 10, 2010 at 03:32 AM Milhouse Says:

Reply to #11  
Positivity and Simcha is what is needed Says:

What's so good about this? is this way to reach yidden? Only through love, not through intimidation and fear...is this our yiddishkeit?! This is definitely not the way chabad lubavitch would ever act!

You obviously know nothing about Chabad. Yes, this is how a rov acts, including a Chabad rov. You don't think R Zalman Shimon Dvorkin would have done something like this? R Yitzchok Groner? R Dovid Chanzin? R Yaacov Landau? Let alone the legendary Chabad rabbonim of old, like R Levik Schneersohn, R Mendel Gluskin, Radatz Chein, etc. A rov has to have a toikef; when it comes לאפרושי מאיסורא he must lay down the law and not be afraid. לא תגורו מפני איש. Love had its place, but not while the avera is going on. At other times the rov must reach out lovingly, so that people respect him and heed him when he blows his top.

32

 Mar 10, 2010 at 04:35 AM GNer Says:

What I heard, was that the party was held on a fast day (perhaps asara bteves). A lot of Persians (sfardim) were raised very traditional, and then they decided that they have to be more like us frei ashkenazi's and they went very downhill. That really saddens the Rabbonim. Not justifying trespass, but just adding some perspective to it.

33

 Mar 10, 2010 at 06:51 AM Anonymous Says:

Reply to #12  
Anonymous Says:

he has helped shape the greatneck community and many people now cover their hair go to the mivah and keep shabbos because of him,
halivey we have these rabbis in our ashkanaz world that we would shake

I am Ashkenazic but I have always understod that all Sephardim and Iranians were very makpid on Mikve, more so than less religious Ashkenazim.
I mention this only to reply to a post that says the Rabbi helped the community use the Mikve.

34

 Mar 10, 2010 at 08:02 AM formally Says:

there must be a lot more to the story.

Since in most cases in a rov would storm into a party that the people did not know him well would just laugh and not take him seriously. people shaken up, crying, they must really respect him.

Too bad he did not storm into a room when people where money laundering

36

 Mar 10, 2010 at 08:35 AM Anonymous Says:

Wow! What a beautiful story! B"H Loi Alman Yisruel!!!!

37

 Mar 10, 2010 at 08:45 AM Anonymous Says:

I find it hard to believe this article that Rabbi Aderet CURSED "they would be cursed with “illness, bankruptcy and tragedy for eternity,” . On the other hand Rabbi Aderet could sue for gross slander if it is not true - there is likely a cell video somewhere of this event - would be interesting to watch.
All I can say is that if I was shaky in my orthodoxy and a Rabbi would take this (alleged) approach I would run as far away from orthodoxy as possible.
Am I missing something here ?

38

 Mar 10, 2010 at 08:48 AM Anonymous Says:

Reply to #25  
Anonymous Says:

Who has a party for a one-year-old that goes until 10pm?

My upstairs neighbor the meshugganeh STARTED a party at midnight for his 1 year old. Woke us up.

40

 Mar 10, 2010 at 08:57 AM To #11 & Millhouse Says:

Reply to #25  
Anonymous Says:

Who has a party for a one-year-old that goes until 10pm?

This Rabbi is Chabad? I live in Crown Heights 25 years & I never heard of him. He's not in the Tzach list. Who is he?

41

 Mar 10, 2010 at 09:07 AM Anonymous Says:

If this is true I can understand guests being freaked out and upset. Most of us are creeped out by cursing (not bad words) even if we don't admit it. There's superstition in everyone to one degree or another, we're all aware of ayin horos, & it must have been very unnerving. IF it's true, which until we hear from someone who was there we don't know.

43

 Mar 10, 2010 at 09:52 AM Why Party? Says:

Reply to #25  
Anonymous Says:

Who has a party for a one-year-old that goes until 10pm?

People like to party, they just need an "excuse" to do so.

44

 Mar 10, 2010 at 09:55 AM This is just not our way Says:

Baloney. We Jews do not curse our fellow Jews. We leave the cursing to a higher authority.
And no, the Rabbonim of old would not have G-d forbid cursed a fellow Jew under these circumstances. Hocheyach Tochiyach? Yes. L'afrushei M'isura? Of course! V'sikallel? Nope. Never. Promising tragedy and other catastrophe upon 'sinners' is not our way. Period. Though of course in Afganistan it works just fine...

45

 Mar 10, 2010 at 10:40 AM Anonymous Says:

Reply to #19  
Halacha Says:

There is a mitzvah of "hochai'ach tochiach es amisech vilo seesa oluv chait" this is brought lihalacha in shulcchan aruch, orech chaim s. 608:2. Not like some MO think that dina dimalchusa allows mixed dancing so who is this rabbi to mix in? Halacha is always the bottom line and MO ignorance of shulchan aruch is not an excuse. Kudos to Rav Aderet. Chazak vi'amatz

What does this have to do with Modern Orthodox people? Perhaps work on your sinas chinam. These people were likely traditional Iranian Sephardim who knew Rav Aderet.

46

 Mar 10, 2010 at 10:42 AM Anonymous Says:

Reply to #27  
Anonymous Says:

what exactly is the annual "hampton shul dinner dance"???
its still an officially recognized orthodox shul -- albeit modern orthodox.

The Hamptons Shul isn't exactly mainstream modern Orthodox....for precisely that reason.

47

 Mar 10, 2010 at 10:45 AM Anonymous Says:

Is Rav Aderet Ashkenazi like the article claims? I always thought he was a Sephardi.

48

 Mar 10, 2010 at 10:48 AM Anonymous Says:

If only us Askenazim had such kavod for chachamim that even the frei among us could be humbled by a rav's words.

49

 Mar 10, 2010 at 10:51 AM M. Aryeh Says:

The standards of Kedusha in Jerome were far higher than this! My Rebbe would have slapped the host in the face if he hosted a mixed dance on asara ba tevet, and placed him in herem until he did teshuva! The community in Great Neck has been corrupted almost as much as the SY community in Flatbush, the difference being that this Rav had the courage to step up and speak out. There is a place for Jews who want to behave like goyim, just not in our community.

50

 Mar 10, 2010 at 11:12 AM grandpajoe Says:

Never let it be said about the Jewish Week, if there is an issue where the Haredi, or orthodix Community does something bad, or improper the Jewish Week will point it out. It is the NYT of the Jewish world.

51

 Mar 10, 2010 at 11:12 AM Anonymous Says:

Since when to we trespass in homes uninvited and threaten people? There are laws against that in the United States.

52

 Mar 10, 2010 at 11:46 AM Anonymous Says:

Reply to #26  
Anonymous Says:

I'm sure Rav Moshe a"h would have handled the same situation the exact same way. Reb Yaakov a"h too. And Rav Pam a"h. And Rav SZ Aurbach a"h.

Rav Pam would definitely have handled it differently. Healways had a soft and kind demeanor to every Jew. He would never curse and would never talk in such a strong way. He would reach out to them and tell them that what they are doing is Assur in the most amiable way so that they will accept it.

53

 Mar 10, 2010 at 11:51 AM Anonymous Says:

Reply to #26  
Anonymous Says:

I'm sure Rav Moshe a"h would have handled the same situation the exact same way. Reb Yaakov a"h too. And Rav Pam a"h. And Rav SZ Aurbach a"h.

As far as the story is concerned, we definitely don't have all the facts. The fact that some people left and some cried shows that they respected this Rov on some level. If not, they would have thrown him out in a fury.
Still, no one should ever curse a fellow Yid, no matter what the situation is. People will always accept something more readily if done b'sever panim yafot.

That's why chabad is so successful - because any Jew can easily see that they are reprimanding because they love their fellow Jew. (and I'm not even Lubavitch)

54

 Mar 10, 2010 at 12:16 PM awacs Says:

Reply to #40  
To #11 & Millhouse Says:

This Rabbi is Chabad? I live in Crown Heights 25 years & I never heard of him. He's not in the Tzach list. Who is he?

No one is saying he's Chabad. Milhouse was saying (I disagree, BTW) that a Chabad Rabbi would do the same.

But I can't think of a single instance (in 30 years with Chabad) of a Chabad Rabbi doing something like this. Not that it was *wrong*, just that it not our derech.

55

 Mar 10, 2010 at 12:20 PM Anonymous Says:

Modern Orthodoxy needs to be eradicated. We should pray for them to do Teshuva, and until then, for Hashem to protect us from it and those infected by it. We can love the diseased people but still we have to protect ourselves form the disease.

56

 Mar 10, 2010 at 12:57 PM Anonymous Says:

Reply to #55  
Anonymous Says:

Modern Orthodoxy needs to be eradicated. We should pray for them to do Teshuva, and until then, for Hashem to protect us from it and those infected by it. We can love the diseased people but still we have to protect ourselves form the disease.

Again I ask, where did Modern Orthodoxy show up in this story? These people are traditional Sephardim from Iran. Some of them probably don't keep Shabbat but would never think of eating non-kosher food and always go to shul everyday and send their wives to the mikvah. This is an entirely different thing than 'modern orthodox' or whatever other groups Ashkenazim separate themselves into.

Besides, if we 'eradicate' Modern Orthodoxy, who is going to pay the bills for all the heilige people in Lakewood and BP who don't work?

57

 Mar 10, 2010 at 12:57 PM Anonymous Says:

Reply to #1  
Gregaaron Says:

This is not representative of our Rabbonim in general, so please let's not have all of the usual anti-Torah commenters ranting about "Taliban concert-banning Rabbis".

"Guests and their children were allegedly so frightened by the rabbi’s intrusion that many left, while others stood shaking and crying, according to those in attendance."
Shaking and crying because a freaky, pasty old man was yelling? HOW PATHETIC.

58

 Mar 10, 2010 at 01:16 PM Anonymous Says:

Reply to #50  
grandpajoe Says:

Never let it be said about the Jewish Week, if there is an issue where the Haredi, or orthodix Community does something bad, or improper the Jewish Week will point it out. It is the NYT of the Jewish world.

The paper is reportig the news...is it the papers fault that your communities are so corrupt and abrasive that this is the news you get? I think not.

59

 Mar 10, 2010 at 02:45 PM Hashem is pleasant Says:

Rav Aderet there were other avenues available besides crashing a party. The many yirei shamayim rabbanim of Great Neck are able to handle and educate their community, thanks but no thanks.

60

 Mar 10, 2010 at 03:21 PM Anonymous Says:

Hashem bless this upstanding Rabbi who still in this day and age can stand up for the right thing

61

 Mar 10, 2010 at 03:24 PM Askupeh Says:

Reply to #34  
formally Says:

there must be a lot more to the story.

Since in most cases in a rov would storm into a party that the people did not know him well would just laugh and not take him seriously. people shaken up, crying, they must really respect him.

Too bad he did not storm into a room when people where money laundering

As of late I like your comments. You are starting to show an open mindedness as you do here. Yes, if people were crying then it does show respect. It reminds me of many stories like this which happened mostly in the past. Nowadays Most Rabbonim are scared of their congregants and don't dare say a word.

62

 Mar 10, 2010 at 03:26 PM Anonymous Says:

Reply to #37  
Anonymous Says:

I find it hard to believe this article that Rabbi Aderet CURSED "they would be cursed with “illness, bankruptcy and tragedy for eternity,” . On the other hand Rabbi Aderet could sue for gross slander if it is not true - there is likely a cell video somewhere of this event - would be interesting to watch.
All I can say is that if I was shaky in my orthodoxy and a Rabbi would take this (alleged) approach I would run as far away from orthodoxy as possible.
Am I missing something here ?

You're missing quite a bit.

63

 Mar 10, 2010 at 03:32 PM Askupeh Says:

Reply to #38  
Anonymous Says:

My upstairs neighbor the meshugganeh STARTED a party at midnight for his 1 year old. Woke us up.

You need to outsmart your upstairs meshugganeh neighbor. Mark down on your calendar what date that was and next year all of you should go to sleep very early and wake up close to midnight. Get dressed and bring along a present and a cake and join the party. You'll have a good neighbor from then on. Az men ken nisht ariber geit men arunter, or lekatchillah ariber.

64

 Mar 10, 2010 at 03:40 PM Pardo Says:

Reply to #58  
Anonymous Says:

The paper is reportig the news...is it the papers fault that your communities are so corrupt and abrasive that this is the news you get? I think not.

The New York Times claims the same, that it's not the papers fault.

The fault is in choosing what and how to report, and both are guilty as sin.

65

 Mar 10, 2010 at 03:44 PM David Says:

Reply to #48  
Anonymous Says:

If only us Askenazim had such kavod for chachamim that even the frei among us could be humbled by a rav's words.

Hmmm.... Well, speaking as an Ashkenazi Jew, I can't recall the last time I was humbled by a rav's words, but it seems like I'm frequently embarassed by a rav's behavior.

66

 Mar 10, 2010 at 04:54 PM Askupeh Says:

Reply to #65  
David Says:

Hmmm.... Well, speaking as an Ashkenazi Jew, I can't recall the last time I was humbled by a rav's words, but it seems like I'm frequently embarassed by a rav's behavior.

So you need to find another Rov. Don't torture yourself with a Rov you are embarassed with.

67

 Mar 10, 2010 at 08:32 PM Anonymous Says:

Reply to #11  
Positivity and Simcha is what is needed Says:

What's so good about this? is this way to reach yidden? Only through love, not through intimidation and fear...is this our yiddishkeit?! This is definitely not the way chabad lubavitch would ever act!

I guess you never slapped your child. Sometimes the greatest expression of love is instilling fear.

68

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