Jerusalem – The Israeli Supreme Court has ruled that a chevra kaddisha (Jewish burial society) cannot impose gender separation during graveside funeral services unless the family of the deceased expressly requests it, according to a report on nrg.co.il (http://bit.ly/1BSLS21).
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The ruling comes following a lawsuit filed by Susanne Ayd of Netanya, who attended the funeral of a family friend where she was instructed by the chevra kaddisha rabbi conducting the service to stand with the other women. The rabbi said men and women must be separated during the services, despite the family’s wishes to be together. During the eulogies, the men and women were set apart by rows of flower pots.
Ayd filed the civil suit in 2011 for damages against the Chevra Kaddisha of Netanya alleging discrimination. Two lower courts dismissed her suit in 2013, ruling that what had occurred was not considered discrimination. The Supreme Court overruled the rulings of the two lower courts and decreed that gender separation on the cemetery ground is not legal.
“Even though a lot of people attending were opposed to standing separately because it was against our worldview (hashkafa), we didn’t want to make a scene and so we did what the rabbi requested,” Ayd wrote in her complaint. “During the whole funeral, I felt humiliated, angry, and insulted because I was forced to stand on the side of the women separate from the men. I don’t understand how in a public place like a cemetery someone could dictate to me where I can stand just because I am a woman.”
In 2013, Israel’s Ministry of Religious Service ordered rabbis not to tell men and women to stand separately unless the family expressly requests it. Despite this, Ayd appealed to the Supreme Court with the help of the Israel Religious Action Center of the Israel Movement for Progressive Judaism.
A lawyer for the Center praised the Supreme Court’s ruling saying, “We praise the fact that the Supreme Court recognized that the chevra kaddisha is forbidden to ask men and women to stand separately at a funeral unless the family of the deceased expressly requests it. Those who have encountered this conduct by the burial society should sue for damages based on discrimination.”
Upon learning of the Supreme Court’s decision, Ayd said, “This ruling proves there is justice in the country. . . .We are new immigrants and our friends are like our family. It really hurt me personally when they told me we had to stand separately and we wanted to be together. I thought to myself what will happen in the future when I die and my children will have to stand separately?”
The chèvre kaddisha should cease the burial ceremony until those gathered there consent to play by the rules.
As I understand women do not go to the cemetery only men.
This is a logical and thoughtful decision. I have been at levayahs where the wife and daughter of the niftar have been forced to stand on the side with a few other women while strangers are accommodated right by the side of the kever. Any cheverah kadishah that tries to impose such separation over the will of the family should be censured.
This is monumental. It may lead to dancing and then….
In Gemara Brachot, Rabbi Yehoshua ben LEvi said that it is dangerous for a man to stand before women when they are coming from handling the dead. The Zohar says that women brought death to the world and that men should be either in front of or behind women at a cemetery, go on separate roads from them after and not look at them because it could cause, G-d forbid, untimely death.Rabbi Yosef Kaaro forbade women from going to funerals.
I’m as Litvish as you can get, but I’m starting to think Satmar has a point.
Charaedim should disobey
In yerushalayim , the minhag is that the children do not go near ura. during the time of the actual kevra. what is forgotten here more importantly is the wish of the Niftar. That is important and people should write a shtar Kevurah. There is no issur
of standing together but for kovod hamess the people should separate duri ng Kaddish. That is respect. This woman jus wanted to make a point and c the for ould not care less about kovod hamess or respect tradition of eretz yisroel. I buried my father a’h recently in the most chassidic manner and the women were treated with utmost sensitivity and participation by the CHAREDEI chevra Kaddish of Yerushalayim’s old memebers. she is just a publicity seeker to make an issue of this funeral !!!!
Whoa, calm down everybody, and read. “a chevra kaddisha cannot impose gender separation during graveside funeral services unless the family of the deceased expressly requests it”. I am assuming that charedi families will indeed want the sexes separates, and so that’s what will happen. And for families who want to grieve together, they should not be prohibited from doing so. Quit inventing issues to vent over.
This may arguably have been the belief of ONE rav over a thousand years ago….I doubt that the concensus of orthodox rabbonim today would engage in such blather that a man who shared the tragedy of a loss of a member of his family with his wife/daughter or other women or even looked at them to provide consolation would be risking death. You call me an apikores, which by virtue of what you say is a badge of honor coming from someone who would make such absurd posting.
the gemara in succcah daf nun beis brings a drasha of chazal that disagrees with the supreme court ruling.
Explain to me why strangers walk after the aron in front of wives and daughters?
Listen, to the unlearened..its a beferishe gemmorah soif mes sukkos that by a funeral has to be separated kol sheken somewhere else…now for those who believe in torah sebal peh what you mocking and those who dont believe aka reform , conservative some MOs, what you doing on a site for shmorei torah umitzvos who believe. go to reform conservative Christian…..site