Beersheba – A small claims court has ordered Chevra Kadisha to compensate a woman with NIS 31,900 (roughly $8,300) for the distress the group had caused her by barring her from walking alongside her father’s coffin during his funeral.
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According to the plaintiff, the rabbi who led the burial ritual in January 2011 ordered the women to walk behind the men in the funeral procession. She and her five sisters were also forced to sit behind the men during the ceremony.
Moreover, the rabbi refused to allow the plaintiff to deliver the eulogy she had written on behalf of her family. The rabbi offered to read out her words of farewell, but she refused due to the personal nature of the text.
Chevra Kadisha, an organization whose volunteers ensure that the bodies of Jews are buried in accordance with Jewish tradition, argued that it does not discriminate against men and women, and that it is always sensitive to the families’ wishes. The group’s representatives argued that the disagreement that occurred over the eulogy at the funeral was resolved. The representatives stressed that the rabbi, who has since passed away, was a volunteer.
But the judge in the case, Amit Cohen, ruled in favor of the plaintiff, and ordered Chevra Kadisha to pay the women the entire sum for which she had sued, plus NIS 1,000 ($260) for expenses.
Poor woman doesn’t have more sense.
Her poor father must be turning in his grave.
From now on the Chevra-Kadisha should have grieving families sign a waiver that they either agree to abide by the Chevra’s ancient tradition, customs and guidelines, or seek another burial society.
It’s a sensitive and difficult time when a loved-one dies, but what other choice is there?
Of course it would be better if the deceased would have signed such an agreement before his/her passing.
I find this case particularly appalling since the VOLUNTEER Rabbi, whom acted on his own judgement at that time, is deceased and can’t argue a defense.
What a farce!
The secular court should not have the right to sue over a religious matter,chevra kadisha shouldnt pay a cent this should be adjucated by a bet din according to halacha
Hopefully, this CK will learn from this experience and not add to the pain and suffering of families in the future. The wives of many gadolim have given a hesped at their leviyah and there is NO issur against such involvement to show kovod hames. The action of the rav in this case was an insult to the niftar and his family.
This is the pain we suffer as a nation when we, those who know the emes, fail to inspire ahavas torah among our brothers and sisters. Invite a neighbor for a shabbos meal, start the process, and maybe in 20 years we won’t have stories like this.
& isreal hase still the chutzpa to call them self a jewish state
Two comments so far both on the side of the Chevra. Whilst I don’t endorse suing people this woman is probably not frum and this whole experience certainly won’t help. How come rabbis around the world manage to show sensitivity and common sense when dealing with less frum people how come in Israel they can’t?
This story wasn’t in Jerusalem which has very specific minhagim. And the two issues mentioned should have been able to be dealt with or accommodated
Are u serious wow u guys need to read up and face the facts that would r allowed the accompany the body and r allowed to give hespedim. Wise-guy its ppl like u who give the datiyim a bar rep. Maybe you should research and think before u comment!
To #1 :
Please show us where the Halacha requires women to be segregated at a kevurah. I’ve been at funerals where women have been forbidden to go to the bais hachaim. I don’t understand why women are treated as if they carry some disease which men might catch if they get too close. Don’t tell me this is out of respect for women.
Please cite halacha (not minhag) that states that women may not participate in a levaya.
In this liberal upside down world I am surprised the deceased was not blamed and sued for dying.
Maybe it was pres bushes fault
This woman had NO business suing the Chevra Kadisha.
The rabbi who led the burial ritual was maintaining Tznius in the Livaya,
NOT practicing gender discrimination NOR deliberately causing pain to the Niftar’s family.
The Chevra Kadisha and the rabbi were all volunteers,
who were doing Chesed Shel Emes for the Niftar.
Evidently, that was not appreciated.
I agree with what #1 wrote above:
“From now on, the Chevra Kadisha should have grieving families sign a waiver that they either agree to abide by the Chevra’s ancient tradition, customs, and guidelines; or seek another burial society.”
I have been at burials that forced Mothers, wives, daughters, sisters to go after the male cleaning crew. This is respect? Why can’t the immediate family go together after the meis and the men follow?
Im not clear about Beersheba, I know in Jerusalem there are close to a dozen different CK, none of which let daughters walk along side the niftar to the grave. They generally don’t let the children go all the way to the grave at all. Those who are aware go to the gravesite before the niftar arrives, and then don’t have to leave. The father chose this CK (whether or not he knew this specific issue), its sad that it has come to this.
While there are sources that would refuse to allow women certain prerogatives at a funeral, there are many others that do allow them.When paskening halacha, one must carefully examine with whom you are dealing. There are certainly many women who don’t mind the minhagim followed by certain communities, there are many others who do. Insisting upon your chumrot can cause undue grief to people already in mourning, bitterness at Yiddishkeit, and often (I know this from personal experience), family strife.
I would rather not have any of these problems than worry about evil spirits dancing. I’ve seen, heard, and tried to deal with the bitterness and strife. The dancing spirits are far less conspicuous!
I find it mind boggling that the family is not running the show at a burial of a loved one. I don’t care how holy you think your customs are, this notion of the State putting some anonymous committee in charge of a burial needs to be overturned. Use the American model… let those who have these minhagim do their thing, but they have no right to impose such practices on others. Of course, that would mean a loss of power for some, but such is life.