New York – Up-and-Coming ‘B’Derech’ Making Strides as Trendsetter in Kiruv Kerovim

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    New York – B’Derech, a movement established by noted Brooklyn Haredi attorney, Mrs. Ruchie Freier, with its stated mission of raising awareness of the need to emphasize the beauty of yiddishkeit in everyday life to the youth of our generation, has recently concluded a successful series of lectures geared toward students, teachers and parents. According to Mrs. Freier, herself a parent, who has decided to dedicate herself to creating a conversation with our community about the importance of creating an atmosphere for the youth of our generation to identify with the beautiful tenets of yiddishkeit, in response to the epidemic of children going off the derech. Mrs. Freier does not use the term “kids at risk,” instead referring to the “community at risk.”

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    B’Derech recently hosted Rabbi Yom Tov Glaser who spoke in front of hundreds of participants in most of the frum communities where his message of being mechanech our children with tolerance, love and care resonated and impacted all those that came to better understand the true key to our children’s hearts.

    B’Derech has instituted a series of lectures that will allow parents and teachers to avail themselves of a how-to approach to dealing with their children and/or students in interacting with other children challenged by the system, yiddishkeit and related problems. “I realized that there are dynamic programs like Aish HaTorah, who have successfully transmitted the beauty of yiddishkeit by kiruv rechokim. How much more important is it to use their methodology to transmit the beauty of our yiddishkeit to those kinderlach that are seeking answers in a non-confrontational manner,” explains Mrs. Ruchie Freier, about her approach to the dilemma that parents and educators are increasingly facing with each passing day.

    “I cannot emphasize enough that the one buzz word that keeps coming back to me when confronting the problem of kids going off the derech is the “pressure” that is being applied to our children, whether it’s by parents, teachers or the society we live in. Although this is an issue which requires more than just the space provided in a newspaper interview, I cannot overemphasize enough how much simpler it would be for us as a community to retain our kids and to see them grow into ehrliche yiddisher tattes and mammas, if only we could accentuate the positive and to value our precious children as opposed to creating a higher statistic of academic achievement and accomplishment. We have managed to teach our children of “Yiras Hashem” what about “Ahavas Hashem” equally important?

    B’Derech will be featuring Miss Chanie Ravitz, originally raised in Williamsburg, who strayed off the derech and became a successful investment banker, only to realize that she asked the questions and issues which plagued her as a frum young woman, continued to torment her upon leaving the frum world. B’Derech is offering the greater community the opportunity to meet with Chanie Ravitz, a survivor of the turbulence of secular society who will share her journey back to Yiddishkeit and her newfound appreciation for Torah and Mitzvos in everyday life. This is an opportunity for yeshivas, parents, rabbanim, askanim, and teachers to avail themselves of a unique lecturer who can share a perspective on proper values and Hashkofos by an individual who has been in both worlds and can answer questions from today’s youth without being judgmental.

    Additional lectures will be given by Rabbanim and Mechanchim who understand the mind of today’s generation yet equally are committed to the timeless and traditional torah values that have sustained Klal Yisroel from time immemorial.

    B’Derech has also set out an ambitious goal of creating a cadre of volunteers who will have the ability to serve as positive role models for our children who are seeking direction in a non-judgmental atmosphere. For more information regarding the time, venue and dates of these lectures, please contact Mrs. Ruchie Freier at 917-509-9518 or via email at [email protected]


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    30 Comments
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    Anonymous
    Anonymous
    14 years ago

    And how is she alleviating the pressure on our kids? Anyone?

    bitachon
    bitachon
    14 years ago

    Without knocking the idea, the kids still have to go to school parents have to live up to the jonses and the pressures abound.
    You gotta work from the inside. With schools and rabbonim that are succesful and ask them what their secret is and share it with other schools.
    No pressuer?! this from a frum attorney and investment banker?! Without pressure they wouldn’t be where they are. There has to be joy and intrinsic simcha in our avodas Hashem and a little pressure goes a long way.
    Hatzlocha rabbah.

    finally
    finally
    14 years ago

    I attended the 1st lecture that she hosted at her house in bp.

    keep it up

    Anonymous
    Anonymous
    14 years ago

    with all due respect to ruchie freier, most kids who stray are the result of a less than ideal home environment, whether an overly strict parent or other childhood issues, and i really believe that parents need to be educated on the harsh realities of parenthood.

    mrs freier has the good fortune of being the wife of a tzadik, so i hope that she has familiarized herself with the prevailing reality.

    Anonymous
    Anonymous
    14 years ago

    Without any substantive changes made in the schools itself no pressure whatsoever will be alleviated. She’s directing her lectures at the wrong audience, the parents. It should be directed at the schools; the principals, teachers, and rebbitzins- not the parents.

    BS
    BS
    14 years ago

    What a zchus for baila ravitz!!!
    a lesson to all: a yiddesha mame’s tefillos & tears never go to waist!!!

    involved
    involved
    14 years ago

    Kol Hakavod Ruchie, I once heard from a great mechanech that “we live in a time of marketing and media and unfortunately we don’t know how to market the Torah”
    Makes alot of sense. when we learn how to market the Torah to our kinderlach we would do much better. it’s sad but we need to learn from Coca Cola and the like how to entice buyers.

    concerned
    concerned
    14 years ago

    part of the real problem with our children is that in our chinuch children do not understand and have basic questions today about the ribono shel olom. when a child asks basic questions in the 8th or 9th grade about the ribono-shel olom the rebbi or moreh does not take out the time to explain to children or maybe does not have the abilty to explain to them. the rebbi or moreh puts down the kid and some t mes embarrasses the child. he feels that if the rebbi cannot answer me and tells me to accept it on face value he becomes disillusioned. he is also then marked Parents on a whole never really sit down to explain to the children because they themselves are not equipped.
    I have heard from parents complaining about this problem.
    if a rebbi does not wish to discuss the matter in class, he must find the time to show
    his concern and speak to the child privately and make him feel that his questions are not bad questions.

    Anonymous
    Anonymous
    14 years ago

    who is she???
    what is she talking about there are hundreds of schools and thousands of kids that are proud of their yiddishkeit and are very happy.Not always do kids have to understand evreything.
    while there are kids who strayed its not bc the system is bad its usually a combination of the home he grew up in or something in his personal life.
    so please if it aint broken don’t fix it.

    Yashar Koach !
    Yashar Koach !
    14 years ago

    Although I learned in Yeshiva when I was young, I drifted for years and when my Father was nifter recently I started to come back when I decided to say kaddish for him. Sadly, as an out of town resident, I have found Chabad to have a welcoming shul on Shabbos, but the davening is unfortunately uninspiring. We need to focus on Ahavas Hashem and Ahavas Am Yisrael and good meaningful teffilos for the kehilla. Otherwise uninspiring davening is just an excuse to get together for a men’s club during the week and Shabbos. If things are bad in NYC just imagine how bad they are out of town. We need inspiration or why suffer through frumkeit?

    Anonymous
    Anonymous
    14 years ago

    It is not just kids that don’t like pressure. It is a generation of wanting things easily..

    don
    don
    14 years ago

    I really think Mrs. Ruchie Freier, Miss Chanie Ravitz, and anyone involved in Kiruv Kerovim are super special. Hashem should bless them with every bracha. Why is it that people are more interested in Kiruv Rechokim? This is way more important.

    Pleasant
    Pleasant
    14 years ago

    Upon reading the biography of Rav Pam Z”L, I observed how, by example, he taught us how wonderfully pleasant the ways of the Torah are, and how we should observe it. He lived a modest and simple life, yet one permeated with fulfillment and happiness. That is the hashkafa that we should transmit to future generations, especially as the world becomes more and more complicated every day.

    PMO
    PMO
    14 years ago

    I don’t typically like to insult people, but #15 and #17 are both morons and I pity any children or grandchildren you may have.

    There are children being abused at home AND in our yeshivos. They are being pushed off the derech. Nobody is noticing them. They sit quietly detatched from everyone else hoping the other bochurim will just think they are shy. Professionals (teachers, school counselors) need to know how to recognize the signs, identify those children and help them. We have a CHIUV to help them. Parents need to be educated as well, and should be included in this instruction.

    Anonymous
    Anonymous
    14 years ago

    Yes, children are being abused in school and at home. It is unrealistic to point a finger in any single direction. However, as far as efforts to change things, practicalities, not numbers, demands that we begin in school. Here’s why.

    Parents come in a spectrum of versions, from great to lousy. On average, things have deteriorated over the years, and we can look to many factors to explain this. Western society has affected us heavily, with values that detract from Torah living. Our clustering in cities, the avalanche of pritzus, the speed of communications and electronic conveniences, etc. are all factors. What our parents did to raise us couldn’t work today, and we have not adapted in ways that are strong enough. In addition, there have been hundreds, if not thousands, of attempts to bring parenting classes to the public. Shamefully, the only ones that attend such programs are those who have managed to be mandated by law to complete such programs, and few interested individuals. One cannot expect to make a badly needed mark on the community by bringing parenting education to the public.

    While yeshivos also contain abusers, there is considerable resistance to admitting that this exists, and the offering of training for teachers and other school staff is seriously unpopular. However, there is a captive audience, and when a yeshiva or school recognizes or admits the need for this (not necessarily an admission that they are harboring an abuser), it can more easily be mandated as a term of employment.

    Many have stated this already, but the chinuch system has serious deficiencies. Perhaps all school and yeshiva staff need to be trained before being permitted to have charge over students. Maybe there should be some sort of mandatory certification that we arrange before letting teachers enter classrooms. Torah Umesorah’s Aish Dos program is one such resource, but is there a school or yeshiva anywhere that mandates such training?

    Anonymous
    Anonymous
    14 years ago

    ruchie is a tzadeikes for feeling and caring about our pain. This is a terrible zoroh of our times and like cancer we have to thank hHashem every second if all our children stay frum and healthy. I am amother of a child who is going off the derech a huge part of the reason is bec against my better judgement I left him in dorms with other kids with problems that we were clueless such as marijuana. This is serious I am telling you that marijuana is stronger than yu and me and it pulls your neshama and mind away from akk achrayus and you just want freedom. ther is so much trouble with marijuana we should have counselors inevery area to deal with this and help before it stoo late. whoever puts down ruchi better go and beg Hashem fast and hard tht this should never ever happen to them or their loved ones. I know many exc families where this happened and many families ewith all sorts of problems and it does not happen. We need to change the whole boys mesivtaq dorm system we need toprevent smoking inabig way bec it is a gateway to marijuana and we could for exmample give free tickent s to hasc concert if abachur gives upsmoking etc. we also must help families in trouble . I thank Hashem for this nisayon for one reason I CAN finally feel the pain of others. Do you think blaming helpsw when hundreds of kids who grew up so frum are in somuch trouble its our holocaust and we better get moving fast to save our ouw kinderlach and anyone who helpos is doing the greatest work of Hashem. Do you think a mother goes into labor and gets up every single day at the crack of dawn and watches a child and feeds them and goes oneverypta and chal hamoed trip and shopping and simchas etc and etc . and can bare this pain. Its like saying if a family did not used bottled water and a child got sick and so you blame the family. There is only one way to ever hope for a yeshua when there is a zarah daven reach out help be supportive and never judge bec I judged and now I am being the judged one. We cannot thank Ruchie enough for giving up her time and kochos to help save our children.

    Chaim bp
    Chaim bp
    14 years ago

    Mrs. Frier keep up your great work! Hatzlucha Raba!

    sharona
    sharona
    14 years ago

    Beautiful article

    I agree that the way to encourage youth is to show them the beauty of Torah and mitzvos and how it connects us to Hashem and brings light to the world